Actually an Artist

A few years ago I got the opportunity to try my hand at stained glass during a churchy conference. But I don’t have a glass studio, so alas this is not that sort of stained glass.

These days when I want to do some sort of visual arts, I usually opt for watercolors. As a busy mom of two it’s about all I have time and space to set up. Symbolically, I like the unpredictability of watercolors. It’s not always a precise medium. I’m sure there are people out there who are precise watercolorists, but I am not one of those–And that’s OK! A lot of my interest in watercolors is about the process. Mixing the water into the pigment, testing it on the palette, applying it to the paper, and adjusting as I go to better align with what is in my mind/what I next feel inspired by. I’m sure that someday there will be less guesswork and more “control”/understanding, but believe it or not, that’s not what I’m going for. As someone who spent 20+ years practicing music at a very high performance level… my whole thing these days is to break free from control/technical concerns/self-judgement.

Aside from not having a glass studio, I also like the transparency of the watercolors-perfect for a stained-glass inspired project. I used washi tape to make a border and some random shapes. I meant to take a ‘before painting’ picture of this step… but somehow completely flubbed the picture. No idea how I managed that. It was just… fuzzy/in motion picture of the background I placed the paper on.

I first painted the teal and blue. As I contemplated my watercolor palette, I went for the ochre color you see in the bottom middle and top right shapes. It’s not a color I usually feel inspired by, but I decided to explore what I could do with it. So then I mixed it with the first two colors. You can see the results-really pretty! With my final two areas I went for a contrasting color, red, and continued that process by mixing it with the ochre for that nice orange in the middle. I ended up with a bright but also tempered color palette that surprised me.

I was not sure how well this off-brand washi tape was going to keep crisp lines. This was absolutely a practice both in playing with water and color, but also submitting to a process of trial and error, and letting myself be ok with the result. This is not often a strength of a professional musician. But seriously, what is actually riding on you ‘getting it right?’ And why does that so often keep us from diving in and making something beautiful?

Anyway, as you can see, the lines did hold, and I ended up with a lovely little painting. To me, it reminds me to experiment, trust the process, and continue enjoying the many aspects of putting a brush to paper. I did this project during my daughter’s nap time. She’s not known for long blocks. Carving out just a little creative self care readied me for the afternoon together.